Tuesday, January 9, 2018

Hanging On By A Thread

I’ve been involved in this town for 6 years. I have lived here for 4 years, and 2 years our family’s lives revolves around this town. As the end of this chapter closes, I have an errie feeling of, just starting the beginning of new relationships again. I don’t feel like I got in a deep friendship. Like no one truly got the time to know the real me. No one tried hard to stay connected with me. ( I’m speaking in my town that our lives revolve around) At times I have felt like, “Yes, this is the girl, that we will have a deep relationship”, but then it ends. It’s mostly very uprupt. Everything is great, she (no one specific person, just a handful of ladies come in mind) is reaching out to me and I reach out to her. I listen to her life stories and she listens to mine. We connect. We enjoy each other’s company, and then nothing. I don’t know why I have such a strong desire to have a meaningful deep, long lasting friendship. I mean I know God has made us to connect to others in a deep way. But I seem to get in this cycle. Of just disappointment. Do I put to much expectation in a friendship? I hear many other people talk about stories about their Best Friends. “My Best Friend this, this, and that”. And I’m over here trying to get and keep a friend, that feels like I’m Hanging On By A Thread and it’s slipping away from my hands. Is it just a mirage of how I perceive their friendship? Or are they speaking Truth about really having a tight bond with this so called “Best Friend”. I know, depend on Jesus, not people. But I really feel in my heart, that I can depend on Jesus, but also have “my person”(if you watch gray’s autonomy, you will know what I am talking about). You may feel sorry for me. Don’t be. Every time I feel this way, Good comes out of it. God stirs up something, something beautiful out of it. First, this blog. Then finding my church I attend now. Then, He said start up a Network for Connecting Moms, thus The Mom Connection, that I run for Moms to support one another. Now, I feel more motivated when we move away from this town, to meet as many people as I possibly can. Put myself out there, not be afraid to meet new people. And maybe I will find “my person” a Bestie, A Best Friend.


                                        Found this picture, speaks perfectly to how I feel
                   https://lonesome-wolf-child.deviantart.com/art/Love-hanging-by-a-thread-64488431


Friday, July 7, 2017

The One with the End of Preschool

It's a wrap. The end of homeschooling preschool. Looking back at this school year, I am so happy I chose to do this. It is very emotional because he is enrolled in my daughter's school for the up coming school year. I desire to homeschool, I'm going to keep praying that it will happen, but only if God allows it.
Looking back over this school year, I just enjoyed being with my son. I love and enjoy teaching him. It can be difficult at times, when he is not in the mindset of listening. It wasn't easy. But  anything worth putting time into is not easy. There is extra stress, less time of what I want to do. My focused seemed to be mostly about homeschooling. What to teach about? Then prep time to get it ready to teach. Then making sure to not neglect cleaning and laundry and other life chores. I'm just being real. If anyone adds anything to their life, there is an adjustment period. I felt like at times I was in an adjustment period and other times I felt like I got the routine down. The hardest part was taking a break for three weeks for Christmas break. I felt like it was very hard to get back into homeschool mode, not so much for me, but for Hezekiah. We were doing so Awesome before that, but then after Christmas break, it was hard to get him to focus. I wish I incorporated more field trips. The best was seeing him write letters on his own. I would think I taught him that! It was a great feeling. Seeing him draw shapes. I taught him that. Hearing him count. I pretty much kept everything we did together and created together. I am so proud of this time Hezekiah and I had together.


Today we celebrated Hezekiah ending Preschool. I wanted to do this last month, but the trophy didn't come in on time and we had to go to camp for my husband's youth group for two weeks. I made a slideshow to show his year in homeschool. I put my heart and Spirit into homeschooling him. I am happy I was his teacher and he was my Star Student. Some days we would cry together and some days we had perfect days of happiness. This year is probably my favorite year with you buddy, One that will stand out beyond the rest. You are gonna do amazing things in this world!

End of Preschool Slideshow

Mommy's Star Student Proud holding his Trophy earned for all his hard work this year

Mommy and her Star Student

Hanging On By A Thread

I’ve been involved in this town for 6 years. I have lived here for 4 years, and 2 years our family’s lives revolves around this town. As the...